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Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Videos

The Gleaming Atmosphere (Video)

I am still in a mute phase where I have nothing to say, but am forcing myself to write one quick paragraph anyway. It is funny, because I can write endlessly on Facebook but that is because I am simply responding to a sea of people and not having to pull anything from within myself. Left to my own devices, I am clear and flavorless jelly, I think.

Drag me cross the floor
Tell me that I’m dead
Music fills my ears
Lightning fills my head and it’s like ah….You’ve been there all along.

Push me on the ground
Pick me up again
Push me down and laugh at me
You don’t know who I am and it’s like ah…. I’ve been here all along.

And now I’m standing in a night so clear
The air so still
The stars so near
It’s like I’ve reached the gleaming atmosphere.

Staring at the wall
Water in my hand
No one there to hold me and I don’t know who I am
And it’s like ah… I’ve been here all along

Dreams that slip away from you somehow when I didn’t know how
To hold onto the bottle for myself.
Dreams that lead the way for your somehow when I didn’t know how
To follow down the glassy road myself.

Pull me to the stairs
Hold me in your hands
Who knows what you’ll do this time or where the dice will land
And it’s like ah… we’ve been here all along.

And now I’m standing in a world so blue
A sphere so far away from you

A stream that leads me down so low
There is no me I flow and flow

A world so far away and clear
The music plays, the stars are near
It’s like I’ve reached the gleaming atmosphere.

 

Meeting the perfect, ultimate man at the mall… but this was from a few months ago when malls were still allowed to be open. 🙁
Categories
Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Red, Soldiers, & Fire

I have friends.

I have friends. They are red.
Close my eyes, I can taste them
Burning hands on my face
Feel their heat, I am never alone.

Circle round, step in close
Feel their fire, let it burn me
Spinning now, I can’t breath
Feel their drums, let them turn me to home.

Guiding me through the ground
I want to dance in your fire through the night.
Falling down, topple me
So many arms that they turn into the light.

Is life cold? Is life mean?
All alone trusting no one.
Then they come touching me
Life is warm. I am never alone.

We are many. We are one
And we will dance thru the flame into the night.
Melting down, swallowing
So many arms that they turn into the light.

All my friends, circle round
Holding hands, never broken
We are one, center bound
Spinning arms, we are never alone.

Build our bed flaming red
And we will laugh as we dance into night.
Falling down through the ground
So many hands that they turn into light.

Download MP3:  I Have Friends

Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Earth, Pink, Mothers, Love Music & Songs

You Are My Home

When I don’t listen you hold a pillow over my face til I do.
That’s why I don’t think you will ever love me now- you’ll find somebody new.

And I swear I wouldn’t care so long as you felt it was wrong
to just grab me by the neck and throw me up against a wall
but when i ask you bout it you tell me that you don’t want to pop
but the crying noise just has to stop.

Sometimes I close my eyes and see a world that’s black with men as white as stars.
Just like a globe that I could shake and shake each time that things have gone too far.

Something I could hold just like a globe inside my hands
So I shake it and I shake it- oh look here comes a man
But he is trapped inside the globe- he’s only one inch high
There is no place to run and hide.

Give it just a little more time. This may only be in your mind.
There’s no way to say what is real and what is make believe you know.
Look at all the stars in the sky, girl. You could find a way to get high, girl.
You could fly away into a state of ecstasy and glee you know.

I know I will stay.
Life- lay your hand on me and guide me on my way.

I stay up late at night and make a list of ways to make you love me more.
I know it won’t succeed cause men they only love the ones they’re fighting for.

And I’d do anything on earth if you would fall in love with me
But there are things I can’t control, I don’t know what you want to see.
The only thing I know for sure is that you like to be alone
But either way, you are my home.

Download Mp3: My Home

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Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Red, Soldiers, & Fire Uncategorized Videos

Lights (Video)

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Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Videos

Poleman (Video)

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Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Purple, Magic & Sorcerers Red, Soldiers, & Fire

The Lights

‘Oh! I wish you were dead.
Then I could get some sleep, just please put a bullet in your head.
Oh! You better not speak again.’
Slide to the floor, let it hold me once more, my thick and heavy friend.

Here come the Lights! Here come the Lights!
I’ll follow them now, though they’re guiding me down
Because they’ve come to set things right.
Here come the Lights!

Oh! It’s like a parade-
Everyone dancing around in the sun while I’m searching for the shade
Or someone who can help me understand the things I’ve seen;
But the dark world engulfs me, he’ll never let go because I am his queen.

Here come the Lights! Here come the Lights!
I’ll follow them now, though they’re guiding me down
Because they’ve come to set things right.
Here come the Lights!

Oh! So this is the night?
And these are the friends who slide under the door in the guise of liquid light?
Oh! This is the Column of Heat!
You have arrived, now I will shut my eyes because I know it’s safe to sleep.

Here come the Lights! Here come the Lights!
I’ll follow them now, though they’re guiding me down
Because they’ve come to set things right.
Here come the Lights!

Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Videos

I am Bone (Video)

This is a song sung by a person who has been murdered. She is singing to her parents who are searching for her, not knowing if she is still alive. It is based on real events. 🙁

I hate dark & scary things. That is why I sometimes write songs about them.  Songs can spin bad things out of this reality into another one.  For the same reason, I rarely write songs about good things, for fear that I might accidentally spin them out of this world.

Here is the lyrics. That is wrong grammar, right?  but I am so tired of good grammar. What has it ever done for me? I just want grammar to match the way I feel. But there are people who judge intelligence by adherence to proper form. I know you aren’t that way, and it is part of why I like you so much.

But I do fear the judgments of others. Mostly, because I don’t feel confident in my ability to survive in this world. Maybe one day I will be walking the streets without food or shelter and the judgments people have of my value will be the only thing standing between me and death.

So, for the sake of survival I try to be dignified. But it is a heavy load to bear. Sometimes I wish I could be free- but you know where freedom leads- straight to the homeless shelter. Or the insane asylum. I also have a fear of being locked up in a mad house, with people using my own words to prove that I am out of my mind. It is a very easy thing for me to imagine.

Did I tell you about the time I was accused of wanting to murder a gigantic man and taken to be evaluated by psychiatrists who viewed my “eccentricities” (such as nail polish & proclivity for walking) as signs of a murderous personality? Did I tell you about the time I was said to have raped a gigantic woman? How would I even do these things and why? I don’t know. But what I do know, is that if you seem different somehow, it is easy for others to project whatever meanings they like onto these differences.

If you want to stay safe, dignity is the best choice. But it is a heavy load to bear.

*

Push through trees at night you’ll never
Find the one you’ll love forever.
Some die, some don’t; some will, some won’t
Follow me & I will show you.

Come find me, keep in mind we
won’t be coming home- I am bone.

Shine a flashlight on the dark ground
Time changes thing until they can no longer be found.
I once swore to go before you
Follow me & I will show you.

Come find me, keep in mind we
won’t be coming home- I am bone.

When they scream you’ll know they’ve found me
Terror and shock they will surround me.
Don’t shake don’t cry, I am nearby
Follow me and I will show you.

Come find me, keep in mind we
won’t be coming home- I am bone.

Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Purple, Magic & Sorcerers Videos

A Sign (Video)

Talk to me, angels, you know I will do what you say.
But time’s running out and I can’t take the bad things away.

Hooked to his fire hose, I’m pounded by night and by day.
Send me just one star- I promise you I’ll break away.

Palm of my hands is a sign
Stretch my arms out
You’ll place your hands in mine and we’ll fly.

So many stars and they seem to shine every which way.
Head in my hands, I can not understand what they say.

Every time he comes, you know that I kneel down to pray.
I saw you shining the last time that he made me pay

And you saw me
What did you do?
No, not a thing
Did I mean nothing to you?

But a sign, give me a sign.

Every road leads to a new road that seems just the same.
Your hands are silky, they’re gripping an ivory tipped cane.

Stand at the crossroads, you stare past me without a glance,
Angels and stars they abandoned me- now I’ll give you your chance.

Dark of the night
Will you love me?
Could I be yours?
Could we be happy and free?

Like a sign, give me a sign.

Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Purple, Magic & Sorcerers

A Sign

Talk to me, angels, you know I will do what you say.
But time’s running out and I can’t take the bad things away.

Hooked to his fire hose, I’m pounded by night and by day.
Send me just one star- I promise you I’ll break away.

Palm of my hands is a sign
Stretch my arms out
You’ll place your hands in mine and we’ll fly.

So many stars and they seem to shine every which way.
Head in my hands, I can not understand what they say.

Every time he comes, you know that I kneel down to pray.
I saw you shining the last time that he made me pay

And you saw me
What did you do?
No, not a thing
Did I mean nothing to you?

But a sign, give me a sign.

Every road leads to a new road that seems just the same.
Your hands are silky, they’re gripping an ivory tipped cane.

Stand at the crossroads, you stare past me without a glance,
Angels and stars they abandoned me- now I’ll give you your chance.

Dark of the night
Will you love me?
Could I be yours?
Could we be happy and free?

Like a sign, give me a sign.

Download MP3: A Sign

Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Red, Soldiers, & Fire

Fall

For a sign
Some people complain about time, boy
I could always see what was mine, boy
I could stand for ever and just watch the stars unwind.

For a name,
A piece of gold to hold in the rain, boy
So buy up all the land you can claim, boy
I will stay behind you in the darkness and I’ll pray-

Pray to men that live in water, men that live in dreams
Show me how to love and conquer, show me what it truly means to

Fall
Show me how to fall.

For a dream
To chase after that glittering gleam, boy
Though things will never be as they seem, boy
Diamonds in your hand evaporating into steam.

And a fate
You can’t stand beside the water and wait, boy
Not many in this world who are brave, boy
I will stay behind you in the darkness and I’ll pray-

Pray to stars that keep us shining, pooling in the night
Stars of love and stars of violence, show us how to truly fight and

Fall
Show me how to fall.

Then the mist
It will flow around you like this, boy
Your thoughts will start to garble and twist, boy
Feeling with your hand to find the something you have missed.

Then the night
It starts when you get used to light, boy
Things will start to dim but not quite, boy
Feeling with your hand you realize that you are dying…

But are you dying from asphyxiation, dying from a flood?
Dying for a drop of luster, dying for some blood?

I will hold you in my mind then, shining like a dream
Emerald lights upon your shoulder- shining like an emerald king and

Fall
Show me how to fall.