(click title to hear song)
I lift the checkerboard to see a little man in black.
I guess his name & call to him; he doesn’t answer back.
It’s always been this way- a game that people play
It’s always been this way- a game.
I lift my eyes the little man is climbing up the hill.
I follow in his shadow till the sun has set & still
It’s always been this way- a game that people play
It’s always been this way- a game.
If you trail the golden thread till dawn he said, til dawn he said
If you trail the golden thread, I will turn my head.
I followed him until the dawn; I had no place to be.
He sat down and I saw him yawn; his heart had set on me.
It’s always been this way- a game that people play.
It’s always been this way- a game.
If you trail the golden thread till dawn he said, till dawn he said
I will place the golden crown upon your head.
I picked the soldier as he slept and placed him in a box.
I nestled him so carefully beneath a golden lock.
I took my little box and walked my soldier up the hill.
I buried him beneath the ground he’s safely sleeping still.
I have trailed the golden thread til dawn I said, til dawn I said.
I will wear the golden crown upon my head.
Somedays I think I feel his tiny fists beneath the ground;
I tell myself I’ll look for him once spring has come around.
Stars swim in the dark of night
Underneath sharks that bite
In between stands I prepared to fight.
Stars swim through the darkened past
Sharks eat bones nothing last
I guard the gate through which you hope to pass.
But please stand with me
For just a minute more because I’m lonely
And please do not forget I hold the key.
If you touch my hand, I’ll be good to you
I’ll open up the gate and you can walk on through
I’ll bow my head, I know I’ll think of you.
Stars struggle to illuminate
Sharks grow tired beneath the gate
I think of you, your hands, your eyes- I wait.
I think of you your eyes, your hands
Your hidden world, I understand at best
I am a shadow to you, man.
But please stand with me
Let our shoulders touch because I’m lonely
And please do not forget I hold the key.
Let your fingers slide in between my own
I control the gate to your only home
I would like to feel your eyes upon my own.
Stars shine against the past
Sharks eat all the crumbs at last
I guard the gate through which you hope to pass.
Stars shine inside my head
In my mind you are my friend
I think of you, the night begins to spin.
So please stand with me
For just a minute more, because I’m lonely
And please do not forget I hold the key
I can feel it burning inside my hand
The golden door to another land
You will walk through, I will remember you man.
Like a grain of sand, you got the world caught in your eye.
You couldn’t see nothing at all.
When you came to, there were figures walking everywhere-
But a ghost, a ghost can’t end the world.
“What does it mean?” you said as you counted the fingers on your hand.
“What does it mean?” you said as you sifted your feet through the sand.
You reached out to touch me, then decided to touch your opposite hand-
But a ghost, a ghost can’t end the world.
What if you were small and I was big and six feet tall?
I would tie you to my back.
Your eyes would grow so wide, I would set you down and stand aside-
But a ghost, a ghost can’t end the world.
Black night, black night- this time of year no one is making love.
Black night, black night can make it seem alright to lose.
Black night, black night- the time of year when ghosts are all around-
But a ghost, a ghost can’t end the world.
The tiniest look can be a deadly hook to a lonely heart.
Saw you once, didn’t like you that much;
Liked you just a little, but that was poison to my lonely heart.
Lonely heart, glass heart, crystal heart just hanging in my window,
like a prism, turning all the light to blue.
Nice man, average Joe, just someone I don’t hardly know,
can turn away to leave, and then I’m falling and I’m falling
through an endless world of blue.
Next time I will lock my door;
I don’t care who it is no more.
Next time I will lock my door;
ain’t no one getting through.
I don’t need to draw my shades;
ain’t no one looking anyway.
Except for me, I’m looking. I’m lying still and waiting,
as the sun is slowly fading and the air is turning blue.
Blue heart, lonely heart, hanging in my window
like a trinket, like a crystal turning all my skies to blue.
Cheap heart, ugly heart, brainless, thoughtless, careless heart,
just hurting me for nothing, destroying me to pieces,
for a man I never knew.
Now I’m gonna lock my door,
I ain’t peeping through that hole no more.
Ain’t biting like a fish no more,
I’m sitting here, I’m sitting here until I’m only blue.
Blue lips, marble eyes- my eyes ain’t gonna meet your eyes,
my eyes ain’t gonna meet your eyes, won’t meet your eyes again.
I’m returning to my bed,
draw the sheets and hide my head.
Eight bony fingers poking out-
that’s all you’ll see of me.
Drag me cross the floor
Tell me that I’m dead
Music fills my ears
Lightning fills my head and it’s like ah….You’ve been there all along.
Push me on the ground
Pick me up again
Push me down and laugh at me
You don’t know who I am and it’s like ah…. I’ve been here all along.
And now I’m standing in a night so clear
The air so still
The stars so near
It’s like I’ve reached the gleaming atmosphere.
Staring at the wall
Water in my hand
No one there to hold me and I don’t know who I am
And it’s like ah… I’ve been here all along
Dreams that slip away from you somehow when I didn’t know how
To hold onto the bottle for myself.
Dreams that lead the way for your somehow when I didn’t know how
To follow down the glassy road myself.
Pull me to the stairs
Hold me in your hands
Who knows what you’ll do this time or where the dice will land
And it’s like ah… we’ve been here all along.
And now I’m standing in a world so blue
A sphere so far away from you
A stream that leads me down so low
There is no me I flow and flow
A world so far away and clear
The music plays, the stars are near
It’s like I’ve reached the gleaming atmosphere.
You’ll make your way with a bag in each hand
one of green and one of blue.
The room will be filled with people talking
but none of them will talk like you.
You won’t know left from right
and there won’t be nobody walking by you.
You give your ticket to the train conductor
but he won’t take it from you.
You’ll turn your head to the side and back up to the wall
until the gold time comes and a hand appears.
But for now child, but for now child, dry your tears.
The alley is filled with scratching sounds
and you’ll press your eyes into the floor.
Two men will be fighting for you
as you’re pressed like a pig against the door.
The world will be grey, it won’t be night or day
and each time you move your blood will leak.
You’ll be red eyed from the twisted tunnel
that blows against the words you speak.
You’ll be questioned, you’ll be misunderstood
until the gold time comes and a man appears.
But for now child, but for now child, dry your tears.
You won’t see nobody anywhere;
you’ll be standing at the cross of space and time.
Blue trees will comfort you,
the roads will be stretched flat and wide.
You will button up your overcoat
and you’ll stand like a soldier in the wind.
Time will start turning backwards
until you’re far younger than a child again.
The wind will blow through you like an open door
until the gold time comes and a shine appears.
But for now child, but for now child, dry your tears.
mister one man
the one man that i always knew
you called me your crystal child
& now someone’s calling you
the shiny bells you’re hearing now
are reflected in your eyes
you’re fingering your spectacles
you’re laying them aside
nestled in your armchair
with the sunshine shining down on you
nestled in your sweater as
it nips the light from you
the sun’s mouth it is puckered now
like a lemon in the sky
the yellow casts a shadow
like a shepherd at your side
fingering your elbow now
i know that someone calls for you
but stay for one more diamond day
one golden afternoon
let me stretch a checkered cloth
beneath the golden sky
let a kettle sing for you
let a dog rest at your side
let me find a posterboard
so i can fan a little breeze for you
let me share some cake with you
so the crumbs can wave goodbye
let me slide my fingers down
those knuckles that have worked for you
stricken stiff like soldiers let me
whisper a goodbye
i can hear that teabell ring
& marmalade it waits for you
but stay for one more diamond day
one golden afternoon
your heart applies it’s bifocals now
you’re seeing near & far
your body’s like a planet now
the sun is like a star
what do you remember now
with a foot on every shore?
are there ladies here surrounding you now?
are there children on the floor?
have memories turned golden?
have they fallen down like leaves?
crushed beneath your walking shoes,
pressed flat beneath your feet?
does your coat have pockets?
is a knapsack at your side?
there’s a coin i saved & a photograph i’d like
to tuck somewhere inside
that tapping hand across your back
that’s me letting go of you
but stay for one more diamond day
one golden afternoon
Fingertips ruffled like lace
Shadows spill like coffee on your face
I know you would prefer something easier
Cotton sheets curl around your leg
Heart sleeps on your pillow like an egg
I know you would prefer something breezier
Lost in the mirror I am, dog chained in the snow
Limp in the legs and circle round, no place else to go
beaten down
lost in brown
ears fill with a buzzing sound
when i close my eyes, i still see the golden crown
Morning wakes drenching us in gold
Hot head always quick to scold
I know you would prefer something dreamier
Hot head always something wrong
I squirm, eager to belong
I know you would prefer something creamier
Cream in your coffee black; watch me fill it up
Overflow and drip and spill; watch me lick it up
beaten down
lost in brown
ears fill with a buzzing sound
when i close my eyes, i still see the golden crown
Sleeping on the floor at night, do you hear me breathe?
Butterflies and unicorns, eager to believe
Close my eyes when they start to burn
Swollen shut, talking out of turn
I know I should have mentioned it earlier
Rest my head on a moldy towel
Thick and thin, forever and now
I know I should have been something pearlier
Dipped in a cotton cloud, that’s my little girl
Nothing’s real and nothing’s wrong
In our little world
Home sweet home
Dog and bone
Old friends calling on the phone
Holding hands with everyone you’ve known
beaten down
lost in brown
ears fill with a buzzing sound
when i close my eyes, i still see the golden crown
Watch the world with hopeful eyes
staring at its black disguise
hiding-where are you?
Underneath a checkerboard
knights and kings keeping score
crying- can it be true?
Under your purple eyes
black squares and white squares lie
fighting- which one is true?
Under your aqua shirt
hope is killed off by hurt
all on the surface is blue.
Don’t lose heart whatever life brings
you must believe that behind all things
Golden Fingers pull on the strings!
Prop your head up on your arm
in your eyes I see no intent to harm
that’s why I love you.
But the day will surely come
when you will kill or be the one
whom they pour their poison into.
Don’t be their fluffy sheep
sink into places deep
let evil flow through your root.
Hardened heart, inky skull
feast like a cannibal
all of the black squares were true.
Killing hurts and killing stings
but you must believe that behind the scenes
Golden Fingers pull on the strings!
When you’re dark, when you’re mean
doing things that shouldn’t be seen
I will be here with you.
Bodies lie, angels spy
we fall to earth, one day we fly
all of the white squares were true.
In the sky they saw
your hand and they understand
you did what you had to do.
Kill or be killed they know
that’s the way black squares roll
all of their tears were for you.
Don’t lose heart whatever life brings
you must believe that behind all things
Golden Fingers pull on the strings!
Life
may not be real
Pikey what a thing to say
you know that you weren’t raised that way
And yet
sometimes I fear
God has left me so alone
a million miles from any home
To walk a road that has no end
The golden hay lies beyond the bend.
But why would we break?
Why would we cry?
In the end it’s only pain
we’ve known it in so many ways
I know
she felt it too
Remember her, that little bird
so soft we never heard a word
A hint of pink behind the door
and in the end a pile of feathers on the floor
Pikey, you know it won’t be long
Take my hand, I can feel their eyes
descending from the bluest skies
My gun
My iron bar
Life remember I was your friend
I knew that you had no end
Your fields were filled with golden hay
Three clouds they fly above then slowly drift away.
I watched the sun fall through the dirt
Inside, something hurt
Though I waited for you, you did not return.
Sun rise, harsh and mean
Eyes burn, what does life mean?
Could there be another place, a world that can’t be seen?
Is God real? Does he understand?
I press my face into your wrinkled hand.
I want to touch the golden one.
I want to walk in his golden sun.
(When you crawl, life can be so easy for you.)
I want to give everything away.
I want to shrink every single day.
And be small, down upon my knees for you.
Your eyes fall upon my face
My brain goes still
and in its place is a silent space.
Your hand upon my head
Buttered tea and a cube of bread
Memories, what do they mean?
Were they only dreams?
Is life real? Can anybody know
The way to truly please a man of gold?
I want to touch the golden one.
I want to walk in his golden sun.
(When you crawl, life can be so easy for you.)
I want to give everything away.
I want to shrink every single day.
And be small, down upon my knees for you.
And every time I fall so low
Watch out, his love flows into my heart
There is no pain; there is only gain.
And every time I see his eyes
Come within an inch of mine
Shine, shine, shine, light divine- all I have is thine.
Am I real? Why try to understand?
I only need to reach out for his golden hand.
I want to touch the golden one.
I want to walk in his golden sun.
(When you crawl, life can be so easy for you.)
I want to give everything away.
I want to shrink every single day.
And be small, down upon my knees for you.
1.
Up and down the stairs I ran
with a scepter in my hand
How to chase the doubts out from my mind?
When the only life I’ve ever known
is to strive for absolute control
and to pull on every string that I could find
To my talismans I cling
I am scared of everything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring
2.
On my back I saw the stars
I remembered fireflies in their jars
How to pull the fire out from the flame?
Can I make the bad ones fall and
crush them into pieces small
and somehow extricate myself from blame?
In my ears are bells that ring
I will conquer everything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring
3.
Ladies dance and ladies sing
they toss their hair; they wear a ring
they won’t amount to anything I’m sure
But I will cut each finger tip
with stony eyes I’ll watch them drip
I’ll stand in puddles red upon the floor
Are there wise men- I don’t know
I grow the way that flowers grow
spreading from their center like a star
I made my bed, I lie in pain
it cools the fever from my brain
but my seeds upon the wind will travel far
I sing the song that roses sing
I don’t believe in anything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring
4.
On my back I saw the stars
they spread out wide, they were my arms
the burning flames that sparkled were my hands
I held my hands up to my face
I gazed into that burning place
so many bright things I could understand
I sing the song that roses sing
I will see through everything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring
It was nearly close to sunset
And the air it was swimming with flies
They were swatted without regret
As I laughed by his side
Dancing in the palm of his hand- fire
Dripping through the blood in his veins
I need to keep walking I can’t get tired
Falling back again and again
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
First his shadow fell upon me
Then he held my little hand in the fire
So I tried to lift my eyes up
But I was tired
Dancing on the back of my eyes now
People always said he was gay
But I saw him slip into the White Palm
That was a good day.
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
Suddenly the trees begin to smile
Twirl me on the pavement for a while
You could give him one more chance
After that I’m on my own.
Sink your fingers deep into the red
Ringing in the air around my head
You could give me one more chance
After that I’m on my own.
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
Not much time until the sunset
Just keep moving for a little more while
Though he killed you without regret
Still he always had the heart of a child
Dance into the river of regret
Dance into the river of pain
Dance into the aquador where we met
That was a good day.
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
Gonna see the river
Goodbye for now, I go
Who am I? I don’t know, nobody knows
Goodbye for now, so long
I will reach for you one day through arms of song…
I saw the people form a long thin line
They surrounded me in a circle; I did not want to die
I saw a dark spot move across the sky
Her message was so clear to me: goodbye, goodbye.
Goodbye for now, I go
Who am I? I don’t know, nobody knows
Goodbye for now, so long
I will reach for you one day through arms of song…
They built their village in the northern woods
This is not my home, one day I’ll leave for good
I cooked my food beneath a veil of stars
This is not my home, I said with quivering arms.
Goodbye for now, I go
Who am I? I don’t know, nobody knows
Goodbye for now, so long
I will reach for you one day through arms of song…
They crossed the river in a long thin line
Their clothes were stacked upon their heads, piled so high
They held each other’s hands with long thin arms
Though I leave this place, I will remember you as fallen stars.
Goodbye for now, I go
Who am I? I don’t know, nobody knows
Goodbye for now, so long
I will reach for you one day through arms of song…
Gotta Make Love
(No recording due to unwholesome content. Lyrics preserved for historical purposes only.)
Three hours I’ve been walkin now
though the halls of this holiday inn
I know you’re hiding out in one of these rooms
by the tingling feel of my skin.
But all the doors just look the same
& silence is all I hear.
But my body’s tingling, my heart is shaking
& I know you got to be near.
My hands start shaking & so I stop
outside room two-hundred & ten.
You could be right behind that door
but I know you couldn’t let me in.
At this very moment you’re probably doing
who knows what with your wife
My body just can’t tolerate this
& I need to get what’s mine tonight.
Cause I gotta make love to you tonight
yeah I gotta make love to you tonight
These tingles is sayin to me that I’m right
and I gotta make love to you tonight
Yeah I gotta make love to you tonight.
Well Jesus he walked on water man
And that’s how we know that he’s true.
And you ain’t gonna know that I’m a child of god
until I start making love to you.
Yeah Buddha he could levitate
and make bread out of sand
& if Jesus could make bread fall from the sky
Then I can make love to a married man.
Cause I gotta make love to you tonight
Yeah I gotta make love to you tonight
There’s a cloud in my head I can’t say what’s right
But I gotta make love to you tonight
Yeah I gotta make love to you tonight.
So I get me in this elevator & start riding up & down.
Then I find me the stairs & just start walking up & down.
There’s bonds here that I want to break
Walls I wanna walk through
There’s pictures that I see in my head
& now I wanna make them come true.
Cause I gotta make love to you tonight
Yeah I gotta make love to you tonight
There’s a fire in my head I can’t say what’s right
But I gotta make love to you tonight
Yeah I gotta make love to you tonight.
If you can dream it if you can believe it
then you can make it come true.
The very thing you’re seeking is the thing that’s seeking you.
You can get free wishes if you knock on heaven’s door
& if you wish with confidence he’ll give you even more.
But wisdom just starts melting down
when my mind turns back to you
yeah I gotta sit down gotta close my eyes
when my mind turns back to you.
Yeah I’m thinking of you stretched out on a bed
I’m thinking of you with no clothes
I’m thinking of me with my hands on your chest
And I’ll feel like I’m gonna explode
Cause I gotta make love to you tonight
Yeah I gotta make love to you tonight
There’s a fire in my head I can’t say what’s right
but I gotta make love to you tonight
Yeah I gotta make love to you tonight.
So many times already that I thought my heart would die
Nobody here to hold me & I’m gazing on the sky
So far from home. So far away.
I wanted something I could own. I wanted something that would stay.
You stretched yourself around me like a field that never ends
People smiled & laughed but I knew they were not my friends
Just like an ache. God help me to smile.
Or go ahead and break me & just make me cry.
You bring the green.
You bring the green.
You bring the green.
A river flows around you & it carries things away
A sun that circles round you but it won’t just end the day
Reaching out your hand to touch some stupid things.
Nothing to hold you so you grow some stupid wings.
You bring the green.
You bring the green.
You bring the green.
A little creek contains a little girl
Glass falls like snow on another little world
You bring the green.
You bring the green.
You bring the green.
Where does he go? Where in the universe is what I mean…
Does he fly endlessly through the skies sparkling, I was wondering?
Or does he sleep until the day has come to bring the spring?
What’s if he’s always near, like a breeze lying here, softly listening?
First we die, then we’re born, robes on our shoulders worn- it’s written in our hands.
He will come, then he’ll die, spreading out far and wide like sun across the land.
Wait for him, a cloud who bears the carriage of a king.
He will bring the living, although we must bring the dreams.
Why do I cry? Why do I feel this way, is what I mean?
Everyone knows the way life will go, always so, if they’re listening.
And when it hurts, it’s only nails forced through a screaming hand…
Why can’t I learn to bleed always remembering it’s his magic plan?
Everyone knows the pain leaves and come back again, that’s just the way life lies.
Throwing us on the wall, first we rise, then we fall; we’ve seen it with our eyes.
Wait for him, he will return on air so fresh and green.
He will bring the living, although we must bring the dreams.
Why is it cold? Here is my hand if that is what you want…
Look up there on the hill all the trees standing there waiting for their moment.
Why do I smile? Why does this passion fill me like a friend?
I can’t wait to remain for the time of greatest pain when we reach the golden end!
Clouds will fly in a wind, everything begins again, you wish that it would stop…
Waking up with your head bloodied in a spinning bed, it’s time to get back up.
Trees will spread in victory; they recognize their king.
He will bring the living, although we must bring the dreams.
I had to leave Mikael
I had to say goodbye
Mikael’s eyes were sunlight
and he didn’t even cry.
Turned my back
I walked away from all I knew before
Left my clothes a-lying
in a pink heap on the floor.
Nighttime could you spare some time for me?
I’m alone now if you’d care to care for me
Man came up behind me
and his beard was gray and dry
Grayness equaled only by the blueness of his eyes
Wound up my intention to flee and run away
Small white lily in his hand
It made me turn and say:
“Pardon me is that a lily that you hold?
I could use a pearl or two from one who’s old.”
Greensleeves, Greensleeves, how can I get my fill?
Walk a mile in these boots, boy, then go in for the kill.
You, showed your ball to me.
You, showed your ball your crystal ball down from the wall
step one two three step right step left for me.
Now I’ve got a bugle and I have my own guitar
Feet extend the stretch of time
My voice spreads wide and far.
New green clothes that fit me well and better every day.
Small white hand upon my shoulder
Turn to hear her say:
“Do you think that you’re an angel of the Lord?
Do you think a child like you can know the score?”
Greensleeves, Greensleeves, how can I get my fill?
Walk a mile in these boots boy then go in for the kill
Greensleeves, Greensleeves, how can I get my fill?
Walk a mile in these boots boy then go in for the kill
Walk a mile in these boots boy then go in for the kill.