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Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs On My Own Purple, Magic & Sorcerers Videos

King of Spades (Video)

Holding hands with the King of Spades
As the sun float by in a yellow parade
He came, he saw, he rose into the flow.

Sun drop down and it turn to gray
All the shadows stretch and they reach away
To who? To why? To what? You’ll never know.

So you tell yourself it’s enough when baby
There are three men waiting to kill you
And if he isn’t tough enough to fill you
You gotta let him go.

Cause when night fall like a sheet of black
You’re going to need someone
You can’t waste your time on a man whose having fun.

King of Spades lying on his back
When you leave the room with his eyes on your back
He came, he saw, he rose into the flow.

Mirror resting against the wall
Till you throw your brush, watch it crumble and fall
To scream, to feel, to cry and to explode.

Then you tell yourself it’s enough when baby
There are three men waiting to end you
And if he isn’t tough enough to defend you
You gotta let him go.

Cause when night come and the stars appear
You’ll need a place to run.
You can’t waste your time on a man whose having fun.

King of Spades, purple robe, eyes at night, shine and glow
Spread the deck tell him everything you know.

Eyes that shine, circling, oh my God I can’t remember anything
Except I wanted you to come and carry me home.

So I tell myself it’s enough when baby
There are three men waiting to bleed me
And if you isn’t tough enough to need me
I gotta let you go.

Cause when night come and the chill appear
The game has just begun.
I can’t waste my time on a man whose having fun.

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men Videos

Sex, Emotions & Relationships

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Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia men Music & Songs On My Own Videos

The Hole

Well I know that he twist me
Didn’t want me around.
Walked off cold, didn’t miss me.
So I’m on my way down
to the town like a ho.

Oh nowhere to go but the sky, dark
Shining for me all alone
On my way home.

First they sneak up behind you
And they want you so bad
Then they roll off to race for the river
Leaving you broken and sad
so you go to the hole.

Oh nowhere to go but the sky, dark
Shining for me all alone
On my way home.

First the sound of the river will make you insane.
But as long as he wants you, then you will remain
You’ll just stay there amazed
You’ll just lay in the dark.

First he show you the starlight
Then he show you the rain
But when his footsteps so dark make you quiver
Then really how can you complain?
You just lay on the ground.

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Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia men Music & Songs Red, Soldiers, & Fire Videos

Jay

Jay, when you wanted to go
Were you wanting to mate her mainly?
Never wanting to save your baby oh

Stay cause I wanted to know
Sometimes I come to cry down this town
Cause I needed a home. Do you ever come near

Come far? Do you ever think of me as someone
Who could be part of your world
Wrapped in a warm red fire?

Jay, when we talk on the phone
Could you ever conceive that maybe
I could not understand why you’re always alone?

And the weather is cold?
Sometimes I come to cry down this town
No one knows where I go. Would you ever come near

Come far? Do you ever think of me as someone
Who could be part of your world
Wrapped in a warm red fire?

Hold your hands behind your back
And tell me that you’re coming back
Leave me with the fire inside

Shadows dancing on the wall
Like crazy men they trip and fall
Somewhere in the fire I hide.

Jay, when you leave me alone
Sometimes I go and stand there crazy
Broken glass in my hand cause I gotta hold on

And the weather is cold.
Every night when I wander this town
No one knows where I go. Would you ever come near

Come far? Do you ever think of me as someone
Who could be part of your world
Wrapped in a warm red fire?

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Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs On My Own Sky Blue, Ether, Flags, and Fairies Uncategorized Videos

Fade Away

Following you, you walk ahead of me
Don’t need no one to tell me the things that my eyes can see.
You look at your cars & you play all your games
& I follow you round that’s the way that God made me.

And I want you to protect me but I know you won’t
So I change my mind to make it all okay.
Cause I know what you love most is just to be alone
Because you love space so I fade away.

You don’t like my dog, you want me to be tan
But when I reach for you, you feel like a man.
And I watch you so careful, you stare at your beer
And you talk about where you think you’ll go fishing next year.

And I want you to protect me but you think that’s gay
Because you love space so I fade away.

Touch your face your nose your hair I love you. Wrap my arms around.
Turn your head you pull your herb out. Then the light go down.

Gotta be silent, I gotta not to scream
Cause said that loud noises can trigger your PTSD.
So I ride in your car as the Tom Petty plays
And you sing at the top of your lungs how you’re free falling.

And I wish you would protect me but I know you wont
So I write a song to make it all okay.
And my friends all tell me that I would be better alone
Cause they hear me crying every other day. Fade Away.

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Charleston, West Virginia My Life Story On My Own Videos

Hi It’s Me Again

Hi, I wanted to write a blog post but I decided to try speaking in video again because the fact is that I have to switch things up in this way or else I will get exploded by Uranus since he is currently passing through my house of work…. he is opposing my sun too which means I need to get a nose ring or something….

If anyone is reading this, please say hi. I have been isolating myself in an attempt to get more work done & stay out of trouble but it is really getting to me…

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Charleston, West Virginia My Life Story On My Own Videos

Why I Liked My Husband so Much



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Charleston, West Virginia My Life Story On My Own Videos

Some Feelings & a Cute Photo

Also, can I just share this super cute photo? I was at an outdoor karaoke event & fireworks went off so Slippers freaked out and started fleeing running onto a little corner onstage cause she was terrified. Then there was this male dog walking on three legs (a wild holler dog) and he went up after her to stand guard and protect her. He succeeded in making her feel safe to where she was smiling again after a few minutes. I just thought that was so sweet. Gallant male animals are so dreamy.

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Charleston, West Virginia My Life Story On My Own Videos Writings

Materialism + a Cry to Universe for Help!

Also, can I just say…. on a personal note, that I need something in my life to change because the pace has gotten so frenetic & the energy is so mental that I can’t calm down or keep up. And yet I’m still teetering on the edge of survival. I wish I could write songs but I can’t slow down long enough to get in touch with myself or access emotion. I feel completely isolated because the way I am making money is secret & places me in no contact with other humans. Isolation increases feelings of panic and danger.

On the other hand, I’m anti-isolated due to many messages from screen people that I have to keep up with but this just makes the wheels spin faster while offering no feelings of safety. I feel like that girl in the dancing shoes fairy tale where everything keeps spinning faster and faster and faster but its never enough.

I don’t know what to do, but probably if I wait until July things will get better. That is when Jupiter moves from my House of Labor & Servitude to the House of Partnership & Marriage. Maybe then I won’t be so alone anymore.

The House of Servitude contains an element of isolation by its nature, being opposite the House of Solitude. Think of how alone a servant is, toiling, toiling, toiling & yet surrounded by those who don’t consider it a full human. Disposable & on the edge of survival.

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Charleston, West Virginia My Life Story On My Own Videos

Hello

Hi, I hope I am even making sense in this video. The struggle to survive is real & it has my brain in a frazzled state from dusk til dawn. Vibrating with panic.