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Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Hurricane, West Virginia Music & Songs Uncategorized Yellow, Gold, Kings, Fathers, and the Sun

Golden Fingers

 

Checker Board
The Greenbrier, West Virginia

Watch the world with hopeful eyes
staring at its black disguise
hiding-where are you?

Underneath a checkerboard
knights and kings keeping score
crying- can it be true?

Under your purple eyes
black squares and white squares lie
fighting- which one is true?

Under your aqua shirt
hope is killed off by hurt
all on the surface is blue.

Don’t lose heart whatever life brings
you must believe that behind all things
Golden Fingers pull on the strings!

Prop your head up on your arm
in your eyes I see no intent to harm
that’s why I love you.

But the day will surely come
when you will kill or be the one
whom they pour their poison into.

Don’t be their fluffy sheep
sink into places deep
let evil flow through your root.

Hardened heart, inky skull
feast like a cannibal
all of the black squares were true.

Killing hurts and killing stings
but you must believe that behind the scenes
Golden Fingers pull on the strings!

When you’re dark, when you’re mean
doing things that shouldn’t be seen
I will be here with you.

Bodies lie, angels spy
we fall to earth, one day we fly
all of the white squares were true.

In the sky they saw
your hand and they understand
you did what you had to do.

Kill or be killed they know
that’s the way black squares roll
all of their tears were for you.

Don’t lose heart whatever life brings
you must believe that behind all things
Golden Fingers pull on the strings!

 

Download MP3: Golden Fingers

Categories
Hurricane, West Virginia Music & Songs Purple, Magic & Sorcerers Red, Soldiers, & Fire Uncategorized Yellow, Gold, Kings, Fathers, and the Sun

The Golden Ring

 

1.
Up and down the stairs I ranCamels
with a scepter in my hand
How to chase the doubts out from my mind?

When the only life I’ve ever known
is to strive for absolute control
and to pull on every string that I could find

To my talismans I cling
I am scared of everything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring

2.
On my back I saw the stars
I remembered fireflies in their jars
How to pull the fire out from the flame?

Can I make the bad ones fall and
crush them into pieces small
and somehow extricate myself from blame?

In my ears are bells that ring
I will conquer everything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring

3.
Ladies dance and ladies sing
they toss their hair; they wear a ring
they don’t amount to anything I’m sure

But I will cut each finger tip
with stony eyes I’ll watch them drip
I’ll stand in puddles red upon the floor

Are there wise men- I don’t know
I grow the way that flowers grow
spreading from their center like a star

I made my bed, I lie in pain
it cools the fever from my brain
but my seeds upon the wind will travel far

Sing the song that roses sing
do not believe in anything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring

4.
On my back I saw the stars
they spread out wide they were my arms
the burning flames that sparkled were my hands

I held my hands up to my face
I gazed into that burning place
so many bright things I could understand

I sing the song that roses sing
I will see through everything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring

 

Download MP3: The Golden Ring

Categories
Earth, Pink, Mothers, Love Hurricane, West Virginia Music & Songs Plants and the Emerald Kingdom Uncategorized

Pillowman

 

You are so soft and warm, dusted with flowers
My face in the palm of your hand, I feel powerful
Tell me again that you like my soft head
I am an egg I will rest in your bed.

Hold me through nightshirts, hold me through pajama pants
Hold me so tight I am forced to give up the dance
Tie me to the bed and don’t let me escape from you
Outside it’s cold, but you are my you are my

Pillowman dance, Pillowman sing
Let me ride, let me ride in your basket that’s filled with the spring
Hope will come again, that’s what they say to me
Every green blade of grass bends down to pray for me

Filling my dreams with the scent of green fieldsSlippers
A world so soft; a world where the obstacles will yield
To a kind world, yield to a smile
A plate full of cookies will persuade luck to stay for a while

Then I’ll walk back to a world that is cold
Where the smiles and the cookies are all bought and sold
But first leave me with something I can understand
A scrap of pink flannel I’ll hide in my hand

Pillowman guard me, stand watch at my door
Comfort me when I can’t comfort myself anymore
When it hurts and they’re trying to charm me
Knock on my door with intentions to harm me

I bury my face in your pillowy skin
Breath through your pores and I feel peace descend
To my brain like a powder that fills up my nose
Is it true- everything comes and everything goes?

Just then the darkness begins to arise
Surprised to find that someone realized
That I I I I deserve to be befriended
Your hands on my heart til the day it has mended

And as the black blood seeps into my brain
Carrying the knowledge that made me go insane
Black leather images bite me with fangs
Held in your arms, I’m contorting with pangs

But Pillowman fights the past with his soft fists
Pulls out his scalpel for the pieces of evil that resist
Because I I I deserve to be defended
My tears on his sleeve for the things that have ended

Head on your heart and your fuzz fills my ears
Stroking my brain as it struggles with so many fears
I wish I knew how not to be afraid
But until then, Pillowman will be my friend.

 

Download Mp3: Pillowman

Categories
Earth, Pink, Mothers, Love Hurricane, West Virginia Music & Songs Plants and the Emerald Kingdom Uncategorized

Potatoes in a Field

 

Hunched in a field, you sing in deep voicesPotato in a Field
The seeds and the soil of a world without choices
Take off your clothes at the end of the day
Lie down in a bed made of burlap and hay

The sun sinks, the sky pinks through your window so crude
Your feet hard, your back scarred, your stomach needs food
But you see your ancestors line up in brown
You hear their solemn songs sung in a round

Voice so low, Voices so deep
They crossed the ocean for you
They crossed the ocean so you could arrive
They never died.

Wiping your brow with the back of your brown hand
Your eyes are like horses, they run across this land
You see more than most, around corners and curves
Your heavy mind stays when the lighter mind swerves

Steady and patient, heavy and kind
Wearing brown pants made of burlap and twine
Nose to the grindstone, monks of the dirt
Callouses, sunsets, and visions that hurt

Voice so low, Voices so deep
They crossed the ocean for you
They crossed the ocean so you could arrive
They never died.

Your eyes follow time when it curves round the bend
You watch all the lighter ones run to destruction
They were mistaken, they thought life had an end
They ate all their seeds and then came to the bend

Shocked to discover the road just continued
Forced to keep marching without any food
You hear their cries and it makes your heart burn
But how can you give to them the things they must earn?

Voice so low, Voices so deep
They crossed the ocean for you
They crossed the ocean so you could arrive
They never died.

You know forever, you know eternity
As plain as the table where you sit for your cup of tea
You counsel your children to never waste seeds
Life is long, you must be strong, persist in good deeds.

You tell them to remember when they labor in the fields
To listen to the voices that sing in their ears
To those who are patient all will be revealed
Remember who you are, my sons- potatoes in a field.

Voice so low, Voices so deep
They crossed the ocean for you
They crossed the ocean so you could arrive
They never died.

 

Download MP3: Potatoes in a Field

Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Hurricane, West Virginia Minerals, Mountains, Crystals, Ice, and White Music & Songs Plants and the Emerald Kingdom Uncategorized

Over the Green

 

Over the Green

 

I don’t like microbes; please don’t touch my arm with your fingernails
I’ve already thrown up in my own mouth three times today 
I twist and spin, still the world presses in like a gauzy veil
Covers my eyes, lies, fuzzy, and white
Voices smile, laugh, holding me tight to the ground
I’ll survive
Let me be- I’m not going outside
Where the butterflies fly too far away to be seen
Over the green.Boxed Worm

I don’t like good people, they don’t feel what they say feel
They’ll never give up their candy for children to eat
They flit and shine as the world crumbles down to obey their will
Buries me down, brown under their feet
Hear me beg, cry, I know defeat- it’s alright
I’ll survive
Let me be- I’m not going outside
Where the butterflies fly too far away to be seen
Over the green.

Stick to the underside, shrug it off for the final time
Spit out the silk line and follow it home.

I don’t like feeling that your brain is in this same building
I’ll blank my my mind as I stare at a big empty screen
A bag of chips and a diet coke; that’s all I need now
You can poke, prod, urge me to live
You can stare, scratch tell that that I must forgive
I’ll survive
Let me be, I’m not going alive

I will fight, bite, leave me alone
Here to die, fly, I’m going home- it’s alright
I’ll survive
In a way, I’m already outside
Where the butterflies fly too far away to be seen
Over the green.

 

Download MP3: Over the Green

Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Hurricane, West Virginia Music & Songs Uncategorized

Hard

 

Tell me that you like my hat, walking through the garden path, filtered sun
Flowers sway in golden heat, smiling every time we meet, like we are one

But I know that you’re hard Goodnight Moon
And I know that you’re full of rain
And the ones you discard
I know they never walk again

Then I see you driving by, almost shy, black man against the sky, and my throat begins to shrink
Though everybody says you’re fine, benign, always smiling all the time, till I don’t know what to think

You gotta learn how to die
So why not look in your eyes

Polishing the silver bright, sparkle in the evening light, catch a smile
Hear a knock upon my door,should I answer it before you go wild

Cause I know you’ve been hard
And I know you’ve been full of rain
Standing there in my yard
Your eyes are soft and wandering

But then you catch me by surprise, oversize, black lightning from your eyes and I tell myself to run
But instead I turn and smile, denial, conversate with you a while till it starts to feel like fun

I know that everyone dies
So why not look in your eyes

Life is like an angry man, best to follow his command, don’t run and hide
See you standing hesitantly, why not have a cup of tea, come inside

Though I know that you’re hard
and I know that you’re full of rain
Still it lowers my guard
to see your brown hands trembling

But then you get me on the ground, hold me down, black spirits all around, till I don’t know what will break
And I try to spin my mind through a rhyme to another place in time, till my brain begins to shake

And then you say let’s have some fun, sticky bun, and you’re reaching for your gun, but I cannot feel your weight
Cause in my mind I’m out the door, zombie whore, shopping at the grocery store till you break my crazy eight.

 

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Hurricane, West Virginia Uncategorized

Feminism

I see feminism as being the natural, inflammatory response of a society that needs to flush out an excess of fashion designers.

Officially, feminism is about wage discrepancies and political power, yet it only seems to arise in places where women are made to feel neurotic about their physical appearance. Eventually, they reach a fork in the road where they either have to become a feminist or have that extra rib removed. By nature, women are designed to be sensitive towards what men think and feel about them. It hurts to feel that you aren’t perfectly beautiful and lovable the way god made you. And- even if you are a celebrated beauty- it hurts to feel beautiful only because you match certain objective standards that could be met by anyone. It makes you interchangeable, a commodity. I think people become feminists from the perception that men are shallow and incapable of true love, therefore it is dangerous to risk being dependent on them.

Here in West Virginia, there is really no feminism to speak of, but no need for it either. Thin or fat, old or young, neatly dressed or wild looking, the women seem unselfconscious about their appearance. They are confident that simply being alive and female will suffice to attract men to them. Judging by the number of children they have, it seems they are right. It is strange, but, while living here I have yet to hear a single man or woman praise or critique anyone’s appearance, including their own.

Of course this may stem from the fact that hillbillies devote less of their brain to imagining how other people see them in general, probably a necessary trait for thriving in secluded areas where admirers and applause are hard to come by. From what I can tell, they derive less pleasure from making a good impression, and less pain from making a bad one. Hence, the classic Appalachian front yard, filled with sofas, rusted pieces of metal, and semi-broken toys. Once I asked a neighbor about her landscaping style. She explained that storing junk in your front yard creates more space inside your house, and keeps the backyard free for games and picnics.

Putting your worst foot forward also creates a sort of protective psychological coating, similar to the No Tresspassing signs that adorn every property. It tells people upfront that you aren’t going to bend yourself out of shape to put on the ritz for them, and if they want a cup of sugar they should go elsewhere. Which is an important vibe to put off. Living in the same mountain crevice can get rather intimate and you really need to have a bit of a barbed wire feeling about you or your neighbors will be cleaning out your fridge before you know it.

But anyway, back to feminism….

The myth of sexism, I think, is that it flourishes among backwoods country people and square religious Midwesterners. My observations, however, have led me to believe the opposite, that sexism- like many contagious diseases- begins in the largest, most cosmopolitan cities who then export it through movies, music, and fashion to the rest of the country.

Of course, this depends on your definition of sexism. To some, sexism is defined by the genders having complementary roles rather than identical ones. To me, it is a mental disease that causes women to have low self-esteem which they then attempt to fortify through male approval. Sometimes they do this through excessive focus on their physical appearance, and sometimes through trying to adopt masculine traits that they don’t actually possess. The classic movie heroine, gunning people down in a leather bikini, would be doing both. In a non-sexist society, females can be pudgy and have no greater ambition in life than to create an “Under the Sea” theme for their child’s birthday party. And their husbands can feel very, very proud of them for doing this.

James is very proud of me for making this picture.
James is very proud of me for making this picture.

Of course, the urban worldview causes psychological stress to men as well. They may no longer feel that being a good husband and providing for their family is enough, but instead feel pressure to worm their way towards the top of the human pyramid. These pressures may also exist in the country, but they are not as strong. It is much less exhilarating to sit atop a tiny pyramid and much less painful to live at its bottom.

Which is why I don’t see sexism as being a problem, in and of itself, in our society. It is just one of the many inevitable side effects that occur when a whole cluster of people try to source their self-esteem from being better than each other. We could start a social movement to make all sexist sentiments go away, but since they would probably be replaced by ideas just as offensive, why bother?

On the other hand, while I don’t recommend trying to wipe it from the planet altogether, I do think there are two little steps we can take to diminish the power of sexism in our own spheres and thus render feminism unnecessary.

1) I think a number of “mental diseases” could be cured just by people expressing themselves more honestly and more frequently. One thing I have noticed with men especially, is that it tends to be the most obnoxious and also the most sexist of them (Donald Trump) who are always running their mouths, while the “better” men tend to remain quiet. This sometimes gives the impression that Trump’s thoughts are representative of men in general. As Edmund Burke said, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”

2) On a personal level, we should relish the poisonous ideas of our group mind to the extent that they spur us on towards greater mental independence. After kicking their babies out of the nest, eagles remove the soft filling to reveal a bed of thorns. When the little birds try to fly back to mommy and daddy, their bodies get cut up and bloodied. Likewise, our group mind is filled with ideas that tend to cut into our self-esteem, and the older you get, the less they seem to flatter you. Perhaps this is by design. These thorns push us, once we are ready, away from the mucoid comfort of conformity, and out into the big blue world to perceive and believe what no one else has before.

Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Hurricane, West Virginia Music & Songs Uncategorized

Spirits Fly

 

 

Spirits Fly

Spirits Fly

spirits fly, one two three, come up behind me tonight
shadows shine, brilliantly, burning behind me so fine

spirits talk, they whisper lies, green trees and cloudy skies- someone is high
spirits breathe upon my face; lighter than than lace I comply

people stare, stare at me, I’ll be what they want me to be- I don’t mind
stay inside, lock the door, prisoner of war so refined

spirits fly, four through six, held by the wrist I can’t lie
burning cry, lost in mist, don’t let them see in my mind

secret things on tippy toe, where do they go in the night
introduce, stop and stare, walking on air it’s not right

never known, misunderstood, nobody’s good in the night
cotton falls all over me, how can i see what is right

silver moon, decompose, never expose us tonight
spirit’s fly, seven eight, drip and dilate it’s alright

people stare, stare at me, I’ll be what they want me to be- but they can’t see in the night
spirits fly nine and ten, sun rises up muscles us into the light

brains will fall back into place,hearts wear their double face, running a race to the light
dreams will dry and disappear, cheer will replace getting high

 

Download MP3: Spirits Fly

Categories
Earth, Pink, Mothers, Love Hurricane, West Virginia Music & Songs Sky Blue, Ether, Flags, and Fairies Uncategorized

i could love you

 

i could love you Poptart James

the touch of silk, the smell of rose
that’s life, that’s the way it goes, i know
the smell of rose and lemonade
close my eyes, not afraid, oh no

everyone that seems to care they feel so far away
imagine that love fills the air, imagine it will stay

i could love you, i
who could love me, not i

a hand that’s overgrown with hair
touch me, that means you care, i know
a hand that smells like lemonade
every day sweet love is made, oh no

big eyes circle round the town
go ahead and stare
big eyes circle round and round
don’t look for love, i looked, it wasn’t there

i could love you, i
who could love me, not i

the smell of lemonade and rose
close your eyes imagine that love flows
the feel of silk where petals lie
please don’t say that love can die, oh no

white clouds settle on the ground and fill the neighborhood
feel my head spin round and round, this must be something good

i could love you, i
who could love me, not i

 

Download Mp3: i could love you

Categories
Hurricane, West Virginia Minerals, Mountains, Crystals, Ice, and White Music & Songs Uncategorized

Fenestra

 

 

You were sweet, you were goodCornstalk Girl
Picking up the coins that they dropped
Trying to give them back just like you should

Fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall
Fall fall fall fall fall through a hole
Nobody knows, nobody knows where you go

There was a hole inside your bone
it made it easier to be alone
cause you could fly
or at least you could try.

Strange ideas knock on your door
You tell them nobody’s home, but you not sure
Is it your mother there dressed like a hag
Maybe a brick of gold deep in her bag

Turn turn turn turn turn turn turn turn
Turn turn turn turn turn to the sky
People say they find the answers there
or at least they die dying to try

There a hole inside your bone
the strangest things come inside when you’re alone
and you would tell them all to leave you alone
but you don’t know which ones belong-
Where is your home?

Heart-shaped footprints deep in the snow
Step by step up the mountain side, places you will never go
Cause you were born born born born born like a birdy to fly
or at least you were born born born born dying to try

sweet things sing with tulip voices
electro shock you have no choices
animals walk in a strange parade
inside your head: what feathery dream are made

a soothing sound deep in your ear
says don’t tell a soul dear- this will be your year
you’ve waded through hate, you’ve waded through fear
now just wait for the rainbow to appear

fade fade fade fade fade fade into night
dreams invade invade your brain
filling it with good and bad light

There is a hole inside your bone
it makes it easier to be alone
cause you can fly
or at least you can try.

 

Download MP3: Fenestra