Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Los Angeles Music & Songs

If You Ain’t Mine

 

What I remember about this song is that right after I wrote it I found out my grandfather had just hung himself.

Self-Portrait with tear drops, hand, and green polka-dot shirt.

 

 

In terms of the song’s meaning, I do think we have a certain number of “chairs” in our life that are meant to be filled by certain people, and if these chairs are filled by “imposters”- people who have nothing to offer us, but just a desire to take- then we won’t have the open spaces to attract the people we really need.

 

 

 

 

Download MP3: If You Ain’t Mine

Categories
Los Angeles Music & Songs Plants and the Emerald Kingdom

Ride You

 

I wrote this song while living in L.A, soon after I started playing guitar and singing. While writing it, I was visualizing a pink triangle riding a green rectangle into outer space. Maybe it is a song about feeling intimidated moving through a sphere (the music scene) where everyone else had far more skill and experience than me, but where I still felt I had something to offer.Painting, acrylic on canvas. Garth Brooks with wings on his horse. Red horse and pink polka dot shirt.

After performing this, a male friend of mine was driving me home and took off his shirt so I could “feel his arms. ” Gross. In real life, I have no urge to touch miscellaneous arms. In dreams though, nakedness symbolizes vulnerability and the exposure of one’s true self.

Sometimes skill is a form of clothing- with enough skill a person can seem very intelligent saying nothing.

 

 

 

 

 

Download MP3: Ride You

Categories
Los Angeles Music & Songs

Ain’t in the Mood

 

A song about a person who doesn’t want to donate blood to psychopathic sex predators while searching for true love.

I wrote it in L.A., when I still had a refreshing mist of anti-man, women’s studies sentiment clinging to me.

Painting of engaged couple on cushions. Red background. Woman in orange dress and black hat.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Download MP3: Ain’t in the Mood

Categories
Los Angeles Music & Songs Red, Soldiers, & Fire Uncategorized

Methodius’ Stand

 

I wrote this song while living in Los Angeles… I heard these tiny, little voices singing it in unison while I was sleeping, so I woke up & wrote it down, although it seemed like an odd little song, and not very rock n’ rolly.
Painting. Acrylic on Canvas. Lady in red coat in front of cityscape.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Download MP3: Methodius’ Stand

Categories
Music & Songs Nashville Yellow, Gold, Kings, Fathers, and the Sun

Pink & Yellow Sky

 

Another song about the “gold time.” When I think of the color gold, I think of wisdom, benevolence, and justice. When the gold time comes, people will be seen for who they really are, good deeds will finally be rewarded, and nice guys will (maybe) finish first.

But, unfortunately, gold is omega of colors, the most stable in value but the slowest to accrue, so it will probably be a while before the gold time gets here. In fact, the gold time will probably be the very last period of time to exist. It may be a little like the Last Judgement- a period where the wheat gets separated from the chaff in preparation for eternity.

But that doesn’t mean a person needs to wait till the end of time to receive their just rewards- mini-gold times happen much more frequently. These are the times when the faith, hard work, and persistence of years finally pay off. Even these mini-gold times can take a little longer to arrive than we wish they would, but still, if you hang on long enough, you can be sure one will roll around eventually. And, since gold is the color of lasting value, the golden harvest you reap will stay with you forever.

Oh Lonesome me. Little Bun cries by river with broken mirror before crossing to the other side.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Download MP3: Pink & Yellow Sky

Categories
Los Angeles Music & Songs Sky Blue, Ether, Flags, and Fairies

Never Be Alone

 

I remember writing this song while walking home from Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf in Los Angeles. Obviously, L.A. is more than just a giant brothel, but for whatever reason, it does seem like relationships there take on more unsavory notes than they do in other places. Maybe due to Hollywood’s influence, maybe due to the fault lines, or maybe from the desert-like climate causing some of people’s emotions to evaporate. Personally, I think it is the latter, especially for white people who have less defense from the sun’s rays.

Painting of girl in pink jacket with purse in subway. Blue eyes.I think this is also the reason for L.A.’s greater interest in all things spiritual- the uplifting impact of the sun, which makes you feel that everything is wonderful and all things are possible- combined with water-loss from the dry air, which removes the heavy, sticky and complicated feelings that are the enemy of most religions.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Download MP3: Never Be Alone

Categories
Los Angeles Music & Songs Red, Soldiers, & Fire

Fade Away

 

Hmmm… I don’t know what to say about this song. Generally, I write down a song exactly as I hear it, without questioning it’s meaning too much, because I have a lot of faith in the images that well up from our subconscious minds. In fact, I think the symbols of our minds are generally more literal than symbolic. They are our way of registering information we are not consciously aware of.

For example, we might say “He turned green with envy” and see that as a figure of speech, but what if the person did actually- on a subtle level- turn green due to envy?  Or let’s say we have a dream in which a demon is chasing us; we may conclude that the demon symbolizes our horrible boss. But what if the boss is so horrible simply because he is possessed by a demon- the exact same demon we saw in our dream?
Confederate generals shake hands as if to say, 'Let's Make Love." Two soldiers, pink leaf, black dot, yellow background. Acrylic on canvas.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Download MP3: Fade Away

Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Music & Songs Nashville The Odyssey

Telemachus’ Prelude

 

Jesus and Mary with peach and turquoise rectangles. Acrylic on canvas painting.

 

Another song from the Odyssey… one thing I love about the Odyssey is the theme of hope, and how long it is reasonable to keep hope alive. This book might suggest that people tend to give up hope prematurely, and are sometimes even encouraged to do so by those who would benefit from their defeat.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Download MP3: Telemachus’ Prelude

Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Music & Songs Nashville The Odyssey

Telemachus’ Oration

 

 

Jaquelyn's Collection. Lady holding three tiny heads.

 

Another song from the Odyssey… this one about Telemachus giving his speech to the councilmen, asking that they protect him from the bullies and freeloaders that have overrun his house in his father’s absence.

But, rather than helping Telemachus, the councilmen choose to not intervene, and instead place the blame on Telemachus’s mother.

Which is, supposedly, how things tend to go in real life. When people are bullied at work, for example, and tell their boss about it, in the vast majority of cases the boss sides with the bully. Why?

 

 

 

 

Download MP3: Telemachus’ Oration

Categories
Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Kentucky Music & Songs

Live in this World

 

Tiny Wars. Portrait and Abstract painting. Acrylic on canvas. Orange, yellow, spring green, and turquoise.

After I wrote this song, a couple of Baptists told me they had been singing the chorus over and over again as they drove from Kentucky to Tennessee, and for me, that shed a lot of light on the song’s meaning.

Although I do think many, if not most, religions are mind control cults, the biggest cult of all is probably our mainstream culture which hypnotizes people into chasing meaningless dreams, valuing things that have no value, and seeing beauty where there isn’t any. It lures us into believing in a flat but challenging world, and casually dismisses as unreal every point of view that doesn’t come directly from our movies and universities. Nobody is really “of this world,” because the world as we understand it is a creation of our own minds. But we, ourselves, were created by a mind other than our own, and are part of a larger world that may be impossible for us to grasp and define.

So, at least, we could recognize that our view of reality is subjective, and not tell people to “get real” when they don’t buy into our ideas.  Telling them to “get with the program” might be more appropriate.

Download MP3: Live in This World