Waves of grey, waves of light.
Don’t fall now- you know you have to
Make it through just one more night.
But I …. know she comes again
I can smell the stinking smell of
Unwashed hair with sin.
Oh men, they need a place to lay the evil that’s inside.
But please girl don’t you be that place,
Just find a way to run and hide!
Oh please run fast, oh please run far
No never stop until you find the world
Where no one knows you, then you’ll cry.
But don’t be scared. Afraid to die.
That was just the original lie.
Waves of grey, waves of pain.
When they settle down what kind of world
Do you think will remain?
Cause I… know she comes again.
I can feel the rotting smell of lying to so many men.
And I. I run so far.
I will run until I find the world
Where no one ever knew me and then I
Won’t be afraid to die.
That was just the original lie.
Waves of stink- I feel her there
In a room by herself and
It’s too dark to think of anybody else
And so she comes. Comes again.
Sometimes you just bow your head and
Let the darkness win and then you run.
Run so far. I will run until
I find a world where no one ever knew me and then I
Won’t be afraid to die
That was just the original lie.
My new bed which came as a box of 5,000 bars. I wasn’t going to bother even trying especially since my wrist is messed up so I can’t turn screws but three people from the shelter showed up like angels & put it together. Megatron* sent me green sheets. So many people have been helpful that sometimes I cry from guilt because I know I’ll never repay them.
That is Glenn on the right, my oldest friend, & Snuffles on the left. Meat** said it looks like a prison bed, which may be just what I need since prisoners are hard & wily.
I feel so afraid. I have to go to court in 10 days for J’s trial & I don’t know what I’m supposed to do or what will happen. It’s horrible. All I wish is that there was something I could do to make things good.
The shelter ladies gave me a choice between a green and a gray basket of home goods & I chose green. It feels like green is the color guiding me forward.
* Megatron is the being formed by women acting collectively. I can’t believe how many women have helped me. It’s humbling. I really don’t think the negative stereotypes about females are true. It seems to me they are angelic beings.
** Meat is the name of a human friend. A lady.